Photo by Priscilla Du Preez from Unsplash

The Complicated Nature of No

March 1, 2021

If there’s something I struggle with it’s unlearning people-pleasing behavior. It’s so prevalent in the Indo-Caribbean (Surinamese-Hindustani) culture I’m from. But I also grew up in Dutch society, which has more direct and down-to-earth attitudes. This means I have a bicultural upbringing, and that there’s already a tension in different norms and values. This tension runs deep, because culture influences our behavior, the way we see the world, and what we think and feel.

Christmas Reflections

February 15, 2021

The holidays are coming. Cue that Coca Cola Christmas soundtrack. Tis the season. Watch out. Look around. Something’s coming. Coming to town. Is it me? Did I watch too many horror movies, or does that seem sinister? You truly can’t escape Christmas. It’s everywhere. On the radio. On TV. In the shops and supermarkets. But it’s probably me.

Anyway, it’s February, so we’re long past Christmas, but that means I’ve had enough time to reflect on how I spent that time last year. I’m not Christian. As far as religion goes, I grew up in a Hindu household, and I consider myself Hindu. We also celebrate Christmas. My parents even celebrated the holiday in Suriname. The influence of Christianity and colonialism.

Christmas is not celebrated in a religious capacity by us, of course. Instead, it’s about spending time together. Eating and drinking together. Exchanging gifts. Dooh dooh dooh... Always Coca Cola. You know, commercialization, and forced social interactions. Who doesn’t love those?! I swear I’m not bitter. I love receiving gifts, especially books.

Moving vs. Moving On

February 8, 2021

When I was almost three years old, my mother and I got on a plane and crossed the Atlantic Ocean. We emigrated from Suriname (in South America) to the Netherlands (Europe). A year later, my father was able to join us.

You see, moving is in my DNA.

My ancestors ended up in British Guyana and the Dutch colony of Suriname. After the abolition of slavery (1833 in Guyana and 1863 in Suriname), former slaves obviously refused to work on plantations, so the British and the Dutch (let’s not forget about the French) found a new commodity: indentured laborers in Asia. Mostly from North India, in my case, though I can’t say that with absolute certainty since I’ve very limited information on my lineage.

I’m working on it.

February 2, 2021

This is my first blog post. I’m finding it difficult to come up with something to write. The idea of sharing my thoughts, of showing myself to you, I find that terrifying. I’m more comfortable with writing about fictional characters than I am with writing about me. There’s such a fear of vulnerability, and my behavioral response is to shut down with nothing to say.

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